Sometimes people suffer when members of their immediate family pass away, even though they have not kept much connection with the person for years. When the so-called dear one dies, all of a sudden they feel that there must have been some special reason why he came into their family. At that time a kind of sadness comes: “I should have been a better person and shown him a little more affection and concern.” This feeling we can call concern.
If someone is very spiritually developed, for a short while he may experience grief when a loved one dies. But as soon as he enters into his highest consciousness, he no longer experiences grief. At that time he feels only the dance of oneness.
Human grief or remorse purifies the aspiring and evolving heart. The idea of grief purifying the soul is all rubbish. The soul does not need to be purified; it is already pure. What is purified is the heart. Sorrow can illumine the heart.
But there is no direct link between grief and the hostile or negative forces. Through our prayer and meditation we will come to feel that our dear one is happy somewhere else. The deeper we can go with our prayer and meditation, the clearer it becomes to us that the person who has physically left us is spiritually with us and around us. When we can feel our oneness with the person we have lost, then our grief disappears.
~ Sri Chinmoy ~