A couple of years ago my little sister (did you catch that my younger sister) was diagnosed with Breast Cancer.
I called God a few choice words and had I been close enough I’d have spit into his eye and given him a swift, mean left hook that would have made his ears bleed for the rest of his eternal life.
I had never been so angry in my life…this is my baby sister we’re talking about.
She’s the very best part of me, it’s like she carries all that patience and kindness and strength for the both of us.
Esther is the Anita that could have been and she has given me the beautiful daughters I will never have and she has made me feel like a rock star (when I was a Musician), the strongest woman in the world (when I became a Mortician) and she made me feel like a real writer for my entire life.
I could go out there and be strong and single minded because I knew that Es carries in her the Anita Marie that can’t be present in the way I’d like to be.
So when she called me up and told me she had this thing in her I was furious…angry…because she was afraid and I would have given my LIFE to take that fear away for her.
Instead Es took away that fear FOR me.
She did the surgery, lost her hair and did the Chemo and raised her daughters and was still there for me when my youngest Son decided to flush his life down the toilet and take us all with him.
Not even the Cancer could come between us…I guess we made our minds up to that right off the bat.
After my Sister had her surgery I was over at her house and she wanted me to see her scar.
She couldn’t touch it she said.
Before we went into the bathroom her daughter Pualani grabbed my arm and said, ” Tia, don’t be afraid. It’s Mommy you know. ”
So we go into the bathroom and Es opens her shirt and running across one side of her chest is a single deep scar.
” What do you think? ”
I was very impressed…” Well done, ” I said.
I wasn’t being flip…it was well done the muscle and tissue were healthy and her color was good. I’d seen scars from that kind of surgery in the old days and let me tell you…they were devastating.
” Does it look bad? ”
I reached out and traced the scar and said ” not at all.”
” Nita, are you sure? ”
” Hell yes I’m sure… trust me. ”
So she did and we’re still close and whatever happens next…I guess happens.
But it’ll be heck of a fight.